Worried About College

Even though I'm only a sophomore, I think worry a lot about college. It's a bit unhealthy. But I've got so much to consider: whether it's trans-friendly, what the people are like, how much the tuition is, how far away it is, how flexible they are, whether or not I want to go to a community college and transfer my credits to a better school...

But of course, the big question is what I want to major in. For quite a while now, I've considered majoring in Philosophy. I like to ask the big question about the world, and could totally write a book about whether or not this world actually exists. But how would I make a career with that?

I could always double major in Philosophy and something else, like writing, music, sociology... But that still leaves me in a rut. What exactly would that other major be?

I know that it's possible to change your major when you get to college. But I don't want to keep changing my major every five days. Maybe I'll just take a gap year to figure everything out.

So stuff happened (warning this post is random)

So this school year has started off well. People are calling me by my correct pronouns (ze, hir, hirs), I got teachers to use my preferred name (Adrian), and the gender-neutral bathroom has been installed (though it's still locked for some reason). My classes are fun, the freshmen are adorable, and I just feel so relaxed.

My friends and I are kind of like the four musketeers. So when pottermore came a long, we started thinking about what houses we would end up in. I ended up in Ravenclaw, my friend Halea ended up in Gryffindor, Alli added a Slytherin to our quartet, and we were all relying on Kelsey (the one that actually goes to school with me) to get into Hufflepuff. And she did. Now I'm just wondering what ninja turtle is the favourite of everyone...

On the topic of clubs, this year I'm mainly focusing on two:
QSA has been amazing. Not as many new people as last year, but there are still a good enough amount to even out the hole the seniors of last year made, and more.
NaNoWriMo club is starting next Wednesday, and I am PUMPED. I've started thinking about what I want my story to be about, and I'm probably even going to make an outline! Ahaha, I am so bad at those. I'm hoping actually joining that club will make me keep writing, because I remember last year I ended up quitting. But this year I'm not giving up!

 On top of the clubs and homework, I have theater. Currently we're doing As You Like It, and I am a soldier for Duchess Fredrica (not enough guys in theater) and Alli is a subject of Duchess Senior. Kelsey is co-head of costumes, and since I'm friends with the other co-head, I'm one of the first of the cast to hear about costumes. Pretty exciting. So there's an update to my life. I guess I should do homework now. And expect me to update this more frequently maybe?

My cousins are leaving soon!

This is a sad thing. I only have one more week of them being here and the time has passed so fast. I've gotten so used to them being here. They really are like siblings to me, and in just two weeks I've been changed so much. I don't have any pics of my cousin Cole, but I do have some of me and my cousin Meagan!

She's the ginger one on the left!

I really am going to miss them. The house will be way too quiet. :c

Also, I saw Harry Potter DH part 2 at the theaters. I cried. Also, Nevile got hot along the years. :I

Geez, guys. You almost let me forget you.

I haven't been on blogger in a long, long time. I want to start blogging again, but I've kinda been cheating on you with livejournal and I don't know which one I like better! Seeing how I already have some followers on this one though, I think I'm going to delete my livejournal. Argh. There are so many websites nowadays. I currently have accounts on facebook, twitter, livejournal, tumblr, deviantart, Gaia, TinierMe, and for a second I was thinking about getting an account on wordpress. I guess I'm just spreading myself a little too thin.

So I'm going to focus on youtube, blogger, deviantart, and facebook right now. Hopefully I'll make you guys some friends (as in, get more followers). Also, I'm writing a song! Yaaay. Now if only I could play an instrument.

Realization

Over the past few days, I've come to terms with some things.

1) I'm really gay.

Well, I kind of already knew that. But over this break in school the sun hasn't come out once, so I've been stuck inside. And when I am stuck inside, I read every post on Everyone Is Gay, as well as a bunch of gay news articles and look at pictures on Lesbians Who Look Like Justin Beiber.

2) I'm very weak.

When I'm not looking up gay stuff on the computer, I'm staring at my flub. Recently I have decided to get rid of that flub by doing 15 minutes on the treadmill every day. Now you might be thinking that 15 minutes isn't very hard, and it isn't for most people. But for me, I have to take 3-4 breaks of 2 minutes each during that time period. And when I'm done, I feel like I'm about to pass out.

3) I'm most likely going to fail Script Frenzy.

I mean, sure, I was pretty rockin on the first two days, and I was ahead quite a bit. But now my storyline is going too fast and I can't space it out to 100 pages. So I think I am going to, yes, give up. Script writing is definitely not my thing.

Interesting day?

Today sort of sucked. After school I got hit with a rushing flow of depression. I could tell because when I have depression I just lie down and either look at the sky and think or cry. And I did the second, just lied on the grass and cried. Maybe it was because of stress, maybe the dementors are coming after me, I'm not sure.

After I was able to stand up, I dried my tears and walked over to some of my friends. I ended up lying down again for a minute or two, but with my face up to the sky, and then I got back up when I started feeling better. And after a while I was laughing with my friends and me and The Canadian ended up getting in a really weird grope battle, and I ended up sitting on top of her. The other people have left, and it's just me and her. So I bring up how I told her I liked her and she didn't do anything, and then it got silent.

Really silent.

So I got off of her and went inside, and while I was waiting for my ride home, she was waiting for hers. Awkward? Yes. I couldn't even look at her without thinking "GOD I'M SUCH AN IDIOT." And now I'm worried that tomorrow things will be even worse and also tomorrow is the first day of April which means:

1) Script Frenzy starts
2) April Fools day
3) I have a big test.

Wish me luck; I'll need it.

Days off with nothing to do.

Yes, I'm staying home from school. Everyone around me yesterday when I was sneezing sniffling and falling asleep in class told me that I should stay home today, so I did.

Yesterday was amazing, by the way. Not only did I find out that I got into Rhinoceros as a part of the ensemble of rhinoceroses, but I also took a nap from 5:30PM till 8:30PM, watched American Idol, ate some cream of potato soup from the can (you know, the kind with the cubed potatoes that fall to the bottom) AND fell back asleep until 9:30AM when I woke up to my mom's easy-over-easy eggs, toast, and some OJ and watched a ton of Meekakitty videos on youtube and it got me thinking...

...Should I start a vlog?
Wow my sentences run on when I'm sick...

Yes, yes, I know. It's so mainstream and what not. But a lot of my friends vlog, and some musicians I know and love started off their lives from vlogging and that got them famous-ish-er then they were before. I know I'm only a freshman in high school, but I'm thinking the earlier I start the more time I have to get viewers? I don't know, I think I just want to do something exciting with my life. If you haven't noticed, I'm quite a dreamer.

I just felt like I needed to rant out to someone. Thanks for listening? (if you even did)

Bye~

I hate the system

OF PUBLIC SCHOOL TRANSPORTATION.

This morning I had to wait about half an hour in the rain with a slight cold for a bus that didn't come for another ten minutes, and eventually had to get someone else to take me to school.

Why? Because the bus broke down.

How the crapadoodles can one bus breaking down make so many kids a half an hour late. And I know it's lack of funding, because we need more buses. Our school doesn't even get its own bus.

But that's my rant for today.

Dr. Horrible is my new role model.

Well, not really. But Neil Patric Harris is the sexiest man ever. PENNY WHY DIDN'T YOU CHOOSE HIM.

Yes, I did just watch Dr. Horrible's Sing Along Blog. And yes, I cried. And laughed. And On The Rise is probably the best song ever, and the face Neil makes in the beginning of Act II makes me wanna HUG HIM.

SO CUTE.

Oh goodness so many caps. But I'm just so fluff after catching up on the Glee episode I missed last week when I was in theater. I have a soft spot for the voices of guys who do small scale musicals that are only popular with awesome people and end up on Glee in at least one episode whose names end in an "-is" sound. Which means Neil Patrick Harris and Darren Criss.

On another note, the first half of the auditions for Rhinoceros were today, and I got a chance to really meet out new director. He seems like a pretty nice guy, and he actually helped us with our auditions. It was a nice experience, and I can't wait to work with him. He has very interesting ideas too, like how the rhinoceroses will be interacting with the audience. AND WE FINALLY GET TO USE THE LOFT.

This is going to be fun.

Today I have a life.

But only for today.

Yes folks, I am DONE with Romeo and Juliet. Or rather, it's done with me. Due to this fact I have a life again, out of the hands of my dear director. But this life will be short lived. Why?

Auditions are tomorrow.

For what you may ask? Well, if you're cool enough you'll know of the French play Rhinoceros, and all of it's sexiness, then I'll tell you it's that. But my life won't be going to my lovely director The Strass. Oh no. It's going to some random director guy whose directing this next show because THE STRASS'S WIFE IS HAVING A BABY.

Yup. It's baby making time. And Quinn came around skipping through the hallways* with the replacement director and introduced him to everyone in every class. Not kidding. So now I am trying to make the most of my life while I still have it. Wish me luck.

Also! I'm going to be participating in the amazing thing called ScriptFrenzy. You should do it too.


Bye!


*NOTE: This is purely my imagination. Yes, I imagine my director skips. A lot.

Flere grunner til at jeg elsker Norge!

Ikke bare elsker jeg deres valuta, men jeg elsker også sine sangere! Jeg tror min favoritt må være... Sandra Lyng Haugen! Selv om jeg er bare en dumt amerikansk, jeg elsker musikken hennes. Stemmen hennes er så pen (og så er hun) og hun gjør både triste og glade sanger!

Såååå søøøt~

Som du har trolig lagt merke til, jeg snakker i norsk i denne bloggen. Norsk er ikke mitt første språk, og jeg er bare bruker en oversetting maskin, så ikke bli sint på grammatikk min! Snakker i norsk virkelig hjelper mig lære enda mer.

Hade!

Why I love Norwegians, and WOAH. Is that Justin Bieber?

First off, Norwegians.

Not only do they have a pretty language, and a beautiful country, but they also have adorable currency. Their coins HAVE HOLES IN THEM. If there's anyone reading this who lives under a rock and thinks Norway is a city in Sweden, 1) You're stupid, and 2) Norway is actually a country. The currency is called a Krone, and their equivalent to the penny (which is actually worth about a USD nickle) is called the øre. A NOK is about 5.6 times as much as 1 USD.

They got little shippies on them~

SO CUTE. Why can't our money be purple and red...

Now to the second thing. The Bieber.

Don't get me wrong, the guy's singing kind of sucks; I CERTAINLY don't follow his every move and whatnot. But I happened to notice while flipping around on the telly that the Beaver seems to be looking older. Like, actually his age. And something interesting to go with that is the fact that his voice has deepened quite a few keys since last summer. I still remember his first music video, and keeping that in mind and fast forwarding to the new Justin Bieber with his shorter hair and deeper voice, only one conclusion can be made.

Justin Bieber is finally going through puberty.

Old Beiber:

New Bieber:

I am still far from even being able to spell his name right on the first try, but with Justin looking his age, I can sort of see the appeal. He's even gotten taller.

He still sounds like a pre-teen girl though.

Next Week Resolutions?

Yes, my minions. These aren't resolutions for the year, or for half a year, or for the next month, but for the next week. It came to me as I was sleeping on the second floor ledge that I really needed to put some order in my life. Give myself some goals. So I began writing down all of the things I wanted to accomplish during next week. Here they are:

+ Don't eat chocolate for the entire week
I highly doubt I'd be able to accomplish this, for chocolate is like the Diet Pepsi that is my life-water. Chocolate is my soul food.

+ Write a blog post every day
Now THIS is more like it. I can totally trash this goal, man. Do it like I did your mom.

+ Lose 5 pounds
Less likely to accomplish. But it's for the sake of my health I guess, so I'll try.

+ Read a long book
I was thinking about the Book Thief, because to me it's an easy read and I could really use one. I haven't read for fun in so long.

+ Write at least one poem a day
I'm going to be reading at the Poetry Slam, and I need some fresh stuff. I'll probably post them here. If my two followers don't mind. Ahahaha.....

+ Learn a lot of Norwegian
Jeg snakker litt norsk (I speak a little Norwegian). I really need to catch up on it, because I want to be at least semi-fluent before I eventually move there.

+ Keep the perverted thoughts to a minimum
I'm too pervy. Saying goodbye to the pr0nz for a week....

That's pretty much it. I'll post again when I get back from school.
Bye, minions.

A post about nothing.

I have just realized the depressing situation that I am in.

I only have two followers on this blog. And this is my only blog.

Anyways, I have finally made an appointment to get my cat spayed. Do I feel bad? No, for this is the cat that goes around terrorizing my other cats, moaning with her arse in the air 24/7, and will try to attack/rape me if I make too many sudden movements while she's horny. She's even snapped my bra-straps with her teeth.

If you've ever had to hide under your bed covers from a psychotic cat in heat, you know what I mean.

On a closing note, Ray William Johnson's song Zombie Love has been playing in my head non-stop for the past few days. It's really really sweet, and I highly recomend that you listen to it. So that's about it. Later folks.

I squished.

Yippity do da, it's Valentines day! That time when you write your lover cheesy poetry, dress all in red, and sing Disney songs.

Yes, my school does all of this.

And, being the cliche ze that I am, I told the person I like that I like them today. And yes, it was awkward as heck. I even pulled the "wait-till-they're-about-to-leave-then-tell-them" card, but I still felt awkward as crap, and now I don't even know if they took me seriously.

This is why I hate it when I can't read someone. Normally I'm fantastic at being able to tell what someone's feeling, but with hir, ze doesn't even give me any nervous twitches or blushes to go off of. Normally ze just looks happy all the time; only one time did I suspect that ze was a bit depressed, but ze could have just been tired.

I think I just want to lock myself, hir, and a psychologist or whatever and have the doctor person make hir show hir ACTUAL EMOTIONS. Cause masks make me twitch.

Well, I've had enough ranting for today. Night ya'll. I'm getting some sleep.
Maybe tomorrow I'll make sure ze knows I was actually serious...

Thumpity thump thump.

Valentines day is tomorrow; I know that because my heart won't stop going thumpity thump thump. See, I have this condition where around this time of year my organs start metamorphosing into about twenty thousand butterflies. Each time it's a different species of butterfly, and this year it was the Plaided Canadian. This species will remain dormant for most of the day, until they are in close proximity to a plaid-wearing Canadian, when they will flap their little wings as fast as they possibly can.

It makes me look like this:

Yeah, not really a picture of beauty there.

And I just happen to know a plaid-wearing Canadian this year too! Who just loves to stand in close proximity to me. And pretend to flirt with me. But thankfully, ze doesn't like to hug people much.

But I'm starting to like hir hugs.

And I wanted to tell this person that I like them before Valentines day, but due to nerves and an unfortunate display of events, I'm going to have to go with the cliche route of telling hir how I feel on that day.

So I will be going into school tomorrow, armed with a bag of Halls and my best friends poking at me saying "you can do it!" and then when I get up to hir my support will leave and I'll be a crumpled mess of nerves on the ground.

Sometimes I just want trade my heart with someone else's. Just once.
I really hate Valentines Day.

It's Been A While

There's a hell in my house
It starts off small
Sitting in a bottle
Thrown against the wall

There's a hell in my house
Growing larger today
From drunken slurs
and the Bitch Parade

Random in-progress emotional poem for you guys. As you can guess, yesterday wasn't a good day in my house. In the sense that my mom was, well, drunk.


Anyways, onto a different topic: FINALS. I'm finally done, thank GOD. Most of my finals were pretty easy, but my civics final sucked. Especially because most of the questions were just talking about what someone who voted looked and smelled like, and how they likes their omelets. Seriously, what the hell. Then I got to go to Wendy's and listen to 50's one-hit wonders. So it was all good.

Oh yeah! I forgot to tell you guys this, but I'm one year older then I was before! My birthday was last weekend, and I haven't blogged in a while, soooo yeah.

Wow, I'm horrible. I should at least write you another snippit of a poem to make things better. Here goes.

"My color is as big as that tree!"
The boy said, with big blue eyes
That hid under his yellow tinted locks

The girl thought he was silly
Smirking, as she knew the truth
That colors didn't have sizes.

"How big is the color of the tree then?"
The girl said, itching to win this
Battle of wits with the child.

"It's as big as a hug" said he
Poising a tender chicken nugget
In his pearly white baby teeth

"How big is a hug" asked she
Taking a large sip of pop
Out of the cup with a bendy-straw.

The boy thought, then said
"Big enough to make you feel
Like a fire pit is in your tummy"

Their mom croutched down
After hearing their little fight
And took them into her arms

The little girl smiled
Knowing then, just exactly
How big a hug can be.




....That made no sense. Sprung into my head though when watching two little kids playing in Wendy's.

Well, bye~

Oh Come On.

Am I the ONLY one who ships Chance and Guerrero from Human Target? :I

New Zodiac Signs, and 100 Theme Challenge

EDIT: Apparently the "new zodiac signs" don't effect anyone at all. Astronomers just suck.

Oh my gosh, new zodiac signs? What is this madness!
But seriously folks, this is for real. Because of movements of planets and stars in space, all the zodiac signs (like Aquarius and Gemini) are attached to different dates now, and there's even a third one. I'm not gonna go all in depth about it, but if you wanna read about it, Google it. I guess I'm Capricorn now, but I still wanna call myself Aquarius, just because that's who I feel I am.

100 Themed Challenge!
I have to say this is one of the best art challenges ever, at the same level as NaNoWriMo. The reason it's on the same level is because it's an art challenge, for literature, drawing, painting, poetry, whatever floats your boat. It has no time limit, and it's just 100 prompts that your brain will nag you to finish. That's it. No rules, no nothing, just do art. I love it.
Here are the prompts if you want to see them. I might post my finished thingies to my website.

001. Introduction
002. Love
003. Light
004. Dark
005. Seeking Solace
006. Break Away
007. Heaven
008. Innocence
009. Drive
010. Breathe Again
011. Memory
012. Insanity
013. Misfortune
014. Smile
015. Silence
016. Questioning
017. Blood
018. Rainbow
019. Gray
020. Fortitude
021. Vacation
022. Mother Nature
023. Cat
024. No Time
025. Trouble Lurking
026. Tears
027. Foreign
028. Sorrow
029. Happiness
030. Under the Rain
031. Flowers
032. Night
033. Expectations
034. Stars
035. Hold My Hand
036. Precious Treasure
037. Eyes
038. Abandoned
039. Dreams
040. Rated
041. Teamwork
042. Standing Still
043. Dying
044. Two Roads
045. Illusion
046. Family
047. Creation
048. Childhood
049. Stripes
050. Breaking the Rules
051. Sport
052. Deep in Thought
053. Keeping a Secret
054. Tower
055. Waiting
056. Danger Ahead
057. Sacrifice
058. Kick in the Head
059. No Way Out
060. Rejection
061. Fairy Tale
062. Magic
063. Do Not Disturb
064. Multitasking
065. Horror
066. Traps
067. Playing the Melody
068. Hero
069. Annoyance
070. 67%
071. Obsession
072. Mischief Managed
073. I Can't
074. Are You Challenging Me?
075. Mirror
076. Broken Pieces
077. Test
078. Drink
079. Starvation
080. Words
081. Pen and Paper
082. Can You Hear Me?
083. Heal
084. Out Cold
085. Spiral
086. Seeing Red
087. Food
088. Pain
089. Through the Fire
090. Triangle
091. Drowning
092. All That I Have
093. Give Up
094. Last Hope
095. Advertisement
096. In the Storm
097. Safety First
098. Puzzle
099. Solitude
100. Relaxation

Happy creativity! c:

Those With Little Get Great Things, Those With Great Things Get Little

The Romeo and Juliet Cast-list was posted today~ I'm the head of the Montague Chorus, but that's not what I want to talk about.

Okay, so if you would actually look at the title of my post, you'd notice that it seems a bit complex, but it's just saying this:
If you don't have much, when you get something small it's amazing, but when you're used to big things and you get something small you think of it as disappointing and stupid, instead of actually appreciating it.

Sadly, there are even upperclassmen of mine who still do this. As a poor girl livin' in a run down shack of a house, I know what it's like to go through bankruptcy and having to use my allowance and college funds when I was little to pay the bills. I'm just a freshman who hasn't gotten many good parts in my life, so when I get to say one line in a play I get all warm and giggly inside. But some people I know HAVE gotten great roles, and still want more more more instead of just trying to get a part in general. And then they get all "I should have gotten that role; I can't live on!" when they get a minor part.

Boo hoo. Just go and sit in your corner and cry your damn eyes out, and leave the rest of us alone.

...Wow that sounded bitchy, but damn, it's true. I mean, just be happy you got a part, and be good sport. Who knows, you might be allowed in the spotlight again later on. Don't just go and think you're all that and a bag of awesome.

Ugh now I'm just ranting. Congrats to everyone who got into the show though! Lets make this good!

Your Grace Is Wasted In Your Face, Your Boldness Stands Alone Among The Wreck

Okay, so apparently I died around December 11th, and have just been reborn recently. I'll just go with that instead of apologizing for not posting anything over winter break. I wouldn't be exagerating much though if I said that I sat on my arse all of winter break.

Because really all I did was eat, watch anime, sleep, and open presents. FML, no life.

But after watching every episode of Katekyo Hitman Reborn! and becoming my mom's pajama model, school started up and I finally had to revive myself from my sluggish state to take on the responsibility of a life again.

SO, up to the present, there's three cool things I want to talk about, in order of... well, there's no real order, but still, here;s the three things.

1) Cake.
Okay, so I'll try and make this short. One of the days my friend's mom was taking me and her to school, there was this song on the radio. And it was called Never There by Cake. Now, I don't know if you know this, but it's one of the coolest newer songs I've heard in a while. And I just love their sound. Now, you might know their more popular song Short Skirt/Long Jacket, which is pretty cool too (though not one of my favourites). I highly suggest though that you listen to Never There, Perhaps Perhaps Perhaps, and Short Skirt/Long Jacket, because after that you will love them. Unless you hate things that are awesome. Like explosions.

2) Romeo and Juliet.
Yup, back to the old CET, I suppose. This time we're doing Romeo and Juliet, that hilarious love story that's really more of a comedic tragedy. I auditioned for the Prince, and didn't get called back, though there wasn't a callback list for the Prince since he's a minor role. But I have high hopes that I'll get the part, or that I'll get Sampson. You know, the "I bite my thumb, sir, but I do not bite my thumb at you, sir" guy. I'll totally make him a sex god and be so amazing at it that Quinn'll be forced to make him show up more in the play /heavy sarcasm. Yeah, acting isn't one of my best talents, I know, but at least I have fun doing it. And some people really liked my Prince thing, so maybe I have shot. I dunno, I'm really just self-pity-rambling now, so I'll shut up.

3) My website.
Yuppers, I've got a website. Well, sorta. It's a google site, and it's pretty awesome so far. I'm probably gonna have a blog on there too, which will probably be more of "what happened today" instead of "what's on my mind". Here's a link to it, so you can just run along and check it out, mkay?

TL;DR: I'm obsessed with the band Cake, I tried out for Romeo and Juliet, and I made a Google Site.

AND PS IF YOU CARE TO KNOW, the song that the title of this post is from is Little Lion Man by Mumford and Sons. Check them out too, they're great.